Keeping the dream alive.

Before i start on the relatively serious topic..
let me say that i'm very very amused.
apparently, our princess sent me an invite to her birthday bash.
a personalized invite, mind you.
addressed to Jun.
-dies-
it starts with..
'Dear Jun....'

it was amusing.
seriously.
then after throwing a fuss.
she sent me a supposedly new invite.
which was still addressed to Jun.

only at the 3rd try, she finally got my name correct.
and it was then that she realised that she had sent 'personalised' invites to others which were addressed to Jun.

amazing girl, this princess is.

rights..
and now i'm having a convo with my dear darling brandon.
about the spelling of his name..which was started by my darling daphne..
heh.
she insisted that it's spelt 'B-R-E-N-D-O-N'
while i insisted that it's spelt 'B-R-A-N-D-O-N'
so..not surprisingly,
i got a 'blahblahblahblahblah' from brandon when i re-verified with him.
and obviously i was correct.
i've been writing notes and postcards to him since the start of time.
ha.
or rather since the time he was my best friend, and vice versa.
and so exciting!
he's going to be at ntu's hall!
and his roomie is his sec school friend.
and since he's from an all guys' school..i presume that it's safe to assume that the roomie's a guy.
:))
and the convo went somewhat like this:
J: eh..so is your roomie shuai?
B: ermmm...i don't think so la..but he's Smmoothhh..
J: eh..smooth no good. it means he's a potential flirt.
B: no comments.

seee..i knew it!
guys who are smooth are potential flirts.
humbug.
and a bitching session with darling brandon is in order..
i miss him man..for all the bitching sessions that we have.

rights..
so...back from my digression..
i just had this msn convo with jem.
it was basically about surrendering to God.
and..
3 years back..
if anyone were to ask me to surrender my handphone to God..
it would prolly take a considerable effort on my part to really hand it over to Him..
albeit not whole-heartedly..
but if God tells me that He wants my handphone today..
i would give it to Him without asking any questions.

i guess the same goes for my laptop.
ask me a month ago..
and i would have thought that you're nuts.
ask me today.
and i would hand it over quite willingly too.
because i've grown somewhat quite detached from it ever since work started.

but..ask of me any other stuff besides material goods..
and i would prolly have to get back to you.
you see.
people tend to surrender stuff to Him when they're ok with it.
it's conditional.
Jem asked if i would surrender my desires to Him even tho there's a non-Christian hunk in front of me..
my answer was..is the hunk an ah beng with a malaysian accent? and who's married?
it's really hard to tell.
i know that we shouldn't be in a relationship with a non-Christian..
cuz that's what the Bible says.
but.
when you're caught in the particular situation,
answers usually don't come that easily..
i've seen many instances where logic is thrown aside because of Man's desires.
and i really want to surrender my all.
but it's hard.
i'm still coping with material possessions..
but i will work my way up to more personal stuff.
but it's going to get hard.
sigh.
very hard.

Help me want to surrender my everything to You.