Keeping the dream alive.

i went up to Lonely's bowl..
'HALLO! WHY ARE YOU NOT EATING?'
'EAT EAT EAT!!! EAT EAT EAT!!'
-shoves the carrots right under his face-

i'm a raving maniac.
heh.

Your Future! by sum41prin
Name or LJ username:
Home:
Location:	Lander, Wyoming
Job:	stamp licker
How much youll make per year:	$106,473
Vehicle:
Quiz created with MemeGen!

do i really want to be a stamp licker with an oh-so-gorgeous car?

Your Future! by sum41prin
Name or LJ username:
Home:
Location:	Lake Titicaca, Peru
Job:	janitor at a zoo
How much youll make per year:	$108,546
Vehicle:
Quiz created with MemeGen!

or do i want to work in a zoo?
Choices choices choices.

I Need a new phone.
I don't WANT a new phone..I NEED a new phone.
the current one keeps dying on me for no apparent reason.
and i'm getting quite irritated with it.
i mean.
i seldom use the phone nowadays.
managed to be an independent adult without the need of a handphone.
except to tell the time. and record birthdays and stuff.
ah wells.
it's time for a new phone.
so..
which one should i get.
these are the current choices.
Nokia 7600 is winning tho.
if not for the funny shape.
i think i've got a love-hate relationship with that design.
shrugs


on the other hand.
I WANT a DSLR.
sponsers are very much welcomed.
amounts both big and small are appreciated.
:)
I prefer NIKON!
and i do NOT care what OTHERS think of NIKON!
NIKON'S D2X!!
WOOHOOO!
<333

z.B Tng: i miss u toooooo

went with the parents to watch this show today.
dad faked his whole office..taking timeoff from work to rest at home..claiming that he has a migrane.
mum has an MC.
the electricity was cut today.
for 4 hours from 10am-2pm.
mum and i woke up, ate breakfast, watched tv until we got cut off, cleaned the floor for a bit, then went back to sleep till 1pm.
got out of the house at 3pm to find that the lifts aren't working.
walked down 14 flights of stairs.
way exciting.. not.

the show was quite good.
Dakota Fanning was gooood.
Tom Cruise was erm..ok lar...
rights..
but the parents were FANTASTIC.
during a scene where the son runs off or something..
my mum went 'WAH'
the only 'wah' in the whole cinema.
it was pretty paiseh funny :)
and since the wars took place in USofA.
the brother told my mum.."Singapore so small..i don't think they'll invade us.."
hur hur.
gosh.
nice show.
not a waste of cash.
-thumbs up-

Don't look back in anger - Oasis

Slip inside the eye of your mind
Don’t you know you might find
A better place to play

You said that you’ve never been (sounds like ’bean’ in order to rhyme w/’seen’)
But all the things that you’ve seen
They slowly fade away

So I’ll start a revolution from my bed
’cuz you said the brains I had went to my head
Step outside, summertime’s in bloom
Stand up beside the fireplace
Take that look from off your face
You ain’t ever gonna burn my heart out

And so, sally can wait
She knows it’s too late as we’re walking on by
Her soul slides away
But don’t look back in anger
I heard you say

Take me to the place where you go
Where nobody knows
If it’s not our day

Please don’t put your life in the hands
Of a rock and roll band
[and? you’ll? ] throw it all away

I’m gonna start a revolution from my bed
’cuz you said the brains I had went to my head
Step outside, ’cuz summertime’s in bloom
Stand up beside the fireplace
Take that look from off your face
’cuz you ain’t ever gonna burn my heart out

And so, sally can wait
She knows it’s too late as she’s walking on by
My soul slides away
But don’t look back in anger
I heard you say

So, sally can wait
She knows it’s too late as we’re walking on by
Her soul slides away
But don’t look back in anger
I heard you say

So, sally can wait
She knows it’s too late as she’s walking on by
My soul slides away
But don’t look back in anger
Don’t look back in anger
I heard you say

At least not today.

The tortoise prefers lettuce to xiao-bai-cai.
and after 2 hours.
he hasn't finished his xiao-bai-cai leaf.
I'm pretty low maintenance with my 1 buckeroo animal crackers.
i like the animals printed on it.
:)
just found out that the ex-blog's on blogshares.
Valuation : B$4,417.41
heh.
buttt...
LIWEI'S BLOG...
valuation: B$9,001.92
and even better..
even my dearest jing's blog is on blogshares.
valuation: B$3,402.53

we really should pool all the virtual money we have and buy stocks in every fmc's blogger blogs.
ha.

been reading blogs.
some random, some not-so-random..
and each have their own issues man.
i mean..i've got my issues too.
but..
these issues seem to revolve around certain themes..
1. Money
yeah.
it's mostly about cash, moolah, buckeroos...
i don't understand why people don't just 'live within their means'..
if you're trying to save cash..why blow it away on cab fare, just because walking from the bus stop to designated place is tiresome.
if you're trying to save for your shopping habit, or for an overseas trip, why not work?
if you're trying to save for something very expensive and important eg. education..why not try cutting down on expenditure and work as well?
i don't get it.
but then again, it might be me.
-shrugs-

i do get impatient with slowness.
and i have a tortoise.
go figure.
Lonely's seriously slow.
it takes like a superbly long time to finish eating his greens.
gah.
i could fall asleep by watching him eat.

yesterday was pretty cool.
besides waving at the wrong person, or rather waving back at a person whom wasn't waving at me..
i was sooo paiseh.
left yf earlier to head down to geylang with the family for a 3hr talk with the lightings people.
and the woman there managed to irk my mum by repeating this phrase 3 times consecutively..
"I send the email for you.."
it was meant to be "i'll send the email TO you.."
and she irked me by saying.. "Thwee" instead of "Three"
golly gosh.
oh and.
the even lorongs in geylang are like the red-light district areas. the odd numbers are safe.
my uncle didn't know this facate of info. and was being stared at for a while after he circled around that 'even' number area while waiting for us.
that's what happens when one leads a too sheltered life.
and my aunt suggested eating teochew porridge at this stall she spotted when the uncle was being ogled at.
and..is it me, or do people drop by for porridge after *ahem* activities have ended at *coughs* hotels?

and Tiff dropped by! and luckily i was there! heh.
almost didn't made it to church.
:)

ah.then went for grandma's birthday!
pretty good.
learnt loads about post-natal blues.
and how being overly protective of your kid when she's a baby would lead to her being overly dependent on you when she's a toddler.
and that's when you'll find her irritating.
and stuff like that which young mums would talk about to older mums with experience.
and i was there just listening to the seminar.
:)

rights.
and for the convo of the week:
(during cg)
C: Didn't Moses meet God face to face?
(After loads of Bible flipping and thinking faces, Joel comes up with a conclusion)
J: No lar..i don't think so. If Moses saw God face to face, then he would have vapourised already.
A: So God's HOTTTTTT!
J: Yeah..God's HOT and Cool!

so..my God's a Hottie and a Cool dude!
:)

and there were more such convos but i forgot.

Guess who's going for NDP 2005 @ the Padang on the 9th of August 2005?
-beams-
4 tickets for me!
-beams-
in the block right smack in front of city hall.
woohoo.
yayness.
this header doesn't look THAT good.
but blah!
heh.
better photos will come on the 9th.
-grins-

do you know how reading about something random might just cause your brain to be filled with that random thought for i've-got-no-idea-when?
for example.
i was reading tng's blog..
and she mentioned a jay chou song..xing qing i think..
and for someone who shuns chinese songs faster than you can say..erm..chinese songs..
that stupid song has been playing in my brain for the past 5 mins!
ARGH.
i need some other random song to kick the chinese song away.
grrrr.
so.
next time.
please come with a warning label.
esp. if chinese lyrics are quoted as well. esp for songs that are frequently aired on tv/radio/taxi driver's radio.
thanks.
from,
your friendly neighbourhood random thoughts collector.

everyone's scaring the shit out of me.
an ex-classmate has decided to give up his place in ntu to start work as an insurance agent.
the guy in the last entry decided to be an air steward.
and i was is still am very o_O
things don't seem right anymore..
as in..
things don't fit anymore..
they're weird..
they're random..
they're like a beach, green tea, donuts, and hippos.
they have no link!
and i'm puzzled.
i just don't get it.

sybs seem to think that he is THE ONE for me.
i beg to differ.
SERIOUSLY.
tho there was a point, or maybe 2 points in my 20 years here, when i thought the same way.
alas,
HOW CAN HE BE THE ONE?
LOOK AT HIM!
so beng right?
heh.
sheese.
a mistake i tell you. a mistake.
ah wells.
we're friends.
and..
i shall not blabber his deepest and darkest secrets here.
i might get killed.
ah wells.
-shudders-
He is NOT the one.

I love TNG YING!
<33333
officially.
hahaha
i still can't tag on my tagboard.
so..
tngs! it would prolly be easier to get pam to bring it back..cuz if i know jun well enough..he's going to buy wine back too..
and the cheapo (n.B < 20buckeroos) white wines will do.
Rieslings/Verdelho/Dessert Wines.
:))
should be able to get in the shops along the streets.
heh. :D
another alternative would be to just buy what jun buys. haha!
i trust his taste.
:))

and i think i'm getting the hang of this header thing.
:)

*update* I DO love u tng! hahaha..just that now i'm making it more official than it already is mar.. :))

God bless me for i am trugging thru dear ol' friendster for photos that you guys refuse to give.
humbug.
and i realised that i am quite fussy over chicken eggs.
if they're half-boiled, the yolk CANNOT break. CANNOT CANNOT.
if they're sunshine eggs, the yolk CANNOT break, and it must be liquid-y.
any other form of eggs can be dealt with in anyway.
la.
i ate 2 half-boiled eggs with green tea for breakfast!

the cousin and i are different.
and yet alike.
in the simplest of ways:

1. she's in arts, i'm in science
(she abandoned science after the O's, not that she did badly. and i too for arts.)

2. she's into sports esp fighting stuff - muay thai, taekwondo, i'm more laidback - photography, music.
(tho i got my black belt before her..just that i couldn't be bothered to continue)

3. she's into clubs and pubs, i haven't stepped foot in either yet.
(but we both adore alcohol tho..similar preferences of poison too.)

4. she's more mature despite being just a couple of months older, more street-smart too.

5. she's more into asian languages - thai, i'm into europe - german

6. we get together to have bitching sessions. :)

7. we love chocolate..you can't even comprehend the extent of it.

8. we stick up for each other.

9. different kinds of music.

10. she reads more 'serious' or 'thinking' books, i read to get a kick/laugh out of them..in short..she mostly reads to enrich her mind..i mostly read to entertain my mind..

i think we're 2 halves of a whole.
happy and thriving alone in our halves.
and yet there's something, a bond perhaps that links us together.
maybe it comes from being the 2nd and 3rd grandchildren, firstborns of the 2nd and 3rd brothers..
i don't know.
but i think we're

that photo made my day.
heh.
:)
and the cousin decided to pop up at the weirdest places.

been reading way too many james patterson books.
i fall asleep dreaming of killers and bird-people..
i wake up and find that i'm drenched in sweat because singapore's way too hot.
i turn on the air-conditioner to wake up with a running nose and Jamie's unfinished symphony.
i found the balance in the fan.
oh my fan.
what will i be without you.

-snickers at the thought of Dove moisturizing shower cream-
some joke.
toodles.

Over time you’ve healed so much in me, I am living proof
That although my darkest hour had come,
Your light could still shine through
Though tough at times it’s just enough to cast a shadow on the wall,
Well I am grateful that you shine a light on me at all
Who am i¡­ that you would love me so gently?
Who am i¡­ that you would recognize my name?
Lord who am i¡­that you would speak to me so softly
Conversation with the love most high who am i
Amazing grace how sweet the sound that saved a wretch like me,
I once was lost but now I’m found, was blind but now I see,
And the more I sing that sweet old song, the more I understand.
That I do not comprehend this love that’s coming from your hand...
Who am i¡­that you would love me so gently?
Who am I that you would recognize my name?
Who am I that you would speak to me so softly
Conversation with the love most high... who am i
Grace, grace god’s grace
Grace that will pardon and cleanse within,
Grace, grace, god’s great grace
Grace that is greater than all my sin
Who am I ¡­ that you would love me so gently?
Who am I ¡­ that you would recognize my name?
Lord, who am I that you would speak to me so softly
Conversation with the love most high... who am i
Who am i
Who am i
-Point of Grace-

amazing day today.
will upload photos tomorrow.
i'm a smarty-pants.
liwei is officially my solitaire showdown kaki.
we BOTH managed to score 1000++ points in 1 sitting.
and we both won 13 games and lost 13 games.
Go Figure.

i need PHOTOS for the links..
1. Esther
2. Jiehui
3. Gerald
4. Shifu
ah..that's about it..feel like chopping the rest off..heh..nah...they'll be in a section of the links without photos. :D

i still feel like shit.
i hate this.
on the other hand.
i'm a sucker for swans which stare at you (or rather the food in your hand) with their big brown eyes until you give them every single morsel that you're holding onto.
i like orchids.
there are too many varieties.
went to the orchid garden today.
been spending too much time at the gardens.

taking this off dong's(liwei's friend) blog
the best works are like handshakes: one person initiates, two different entities connect for just that one moment. and you walk away not wanting to wash that hand of yours, knowing that it'd only speed up the process of forgetting that the one moment once existed.

i realised that..
nobody said that i was going to feel an instant liberation.
nobody said that the air was going to smell fresher.
the birds are going to sing.
the flowers start to bloom.
and a rainbow pops out of the sky.
instead,
there's a gradual change..
and now..
this is going to sound cliche..
but.
i'm at peace.
finally.
no more noises in my head.
i feel liberated.
:)

to you: Thank you, and i hope things can only get better. might be a little weird at first..but i think after taking the first few wobbly steps..stuff should fall back in place..just like how babies learn to walk. No more cold wars. next time i'll just say it in your face. that should save us alot of time trying to second-guess each other. :)

Top 5 6 Disney Cartoons that Rock my Socks
1. Lion King
2. Finding Nemo
3. Toy Story
4. Aladdin
5. Little Mermaid
6. Beauty and the Beast

Stuff i learnt from The Lion King 1 1/2
1. Look beyond what you see
2. The shortest distance between me and my dream home is a straight line
3. When you always go beyond what you see, when will you know if you're there?
4. A journey of a thousand miles begins with the first step

Great Stuff.
learnt quite alot at church today.
not from the service or of youth..
but from conversing with others.
yup.
and somehow i'm mildly irritated with the Holy Spirit.
ah..i know it has to be my fault..but that doesn't mean i can't be irritated right?

i wonder when we became strangers.
from the relative ease that we used to converse to the stunted conversations that we have now.
i wonder if we'll ever stop being strangers and turn back time.
i wonder why i don't do anything to make this mess go away.
i wonder if it's only me feeling this change, or do you feel it too.

have we managed to slip from 'friends forever' to 'how do you do?'
have we not noticed when this happened?
have we not done anything to turn back time?

maybe it all boils down to pride.
maybe you're proud to say these 2 words 'i'm sorry' and i'm too proud to tell you that i forgive you.
maybe it's pride holding us down, pulling us back, pushing the rift further apart.
maybe i'm still grasping on to my pride, perhaps grasping it too tightly, unwilling to let go of it, afraid of letting go.
maybe you don't know what to say, but really all i needed then was a 'i'm sorry', i didn't need to hear an excuse, a 'i'm sorry if...' all i needed was a 'i'm sorry.'
maybe i expect too much..just maybe.

i'd rather forfeit these current bouts of excruciating politeness,
like the hunter and the hunted, marking careful circles around our territories,
in exchange for the sarcastic remarks we had in the past.
i'd rather not avoid the landmines anymore and just step on one of those just for the heck of it..and if it blows..it blows.
but from the looks of things..i don't have any landmines in my court for me to step on..rather..i reckon you on the other hand think that 80% of your court is filled with landmines, silently beckoning the day you finally take a wrong step and it gleefully blows you up into pieces. all i can say would be..there are landmines but they do not take up 80% of the space, and sometimes it would be easier to let it blow and hit you in the face rather than turn away and walk far away from it.
i'd rather stay a child forever, in my world of 'i don't friend you!!', 'i like you!' and 'MUMMMMYYYY!!! HE/SHE/THEY BULLY ME!!!!!!'
instead..Adultland is full of people who aren't quite sure of what they're doing, of double meanings, of unspoken questions, and no one goes straight to the point anymore.
i'd rather not second guess anymore.
i'm tired.
people assume too much. no one bothers asking anymore.
and the child in me still doesn't know why.

a new place, a new chapter, a new story.

a list of therapeutic stuff to do.

1. make wontons (there's something about mashing the minced pork and diced shrimps and mushrooms around that i can't explain..)
2. try playing Chopin's Fantasia Impromtu (it irritates the shit out of you and yet makes you want to conquer it even more)
3. read all 20 books that you borrowed with all the National Library Cards that you can lay your pudgy hands on. (Romance, Thriller, Cookbooks, Horror, the works )
4. make popcorn (i like the sound fizzling butter makes..and the sounds that the corn kernels make when they shoot and hit the pot cover)
5. driving at fast then slow then fast then slow. (i'm a road hazard)
6. watching cartoons ('nuff said)
7. making a new blog (fun stuff..until liwei finds a new place and i had to figure CSS out..then it becomes irritating.)
8. visiting the Gardens in Napier Road (watching kids holding oversized pieces of bread trying to feed the fish and the occasional duck/swan)
9. picking scabs.
10. blog surfing (i feel that livejournal has very interesting people with blogs that I would want to read, and blogspot besides my certain group of friends have blogs that aren't all THAT good.)

Current Top 10 Cartoons that I watch
1. SpongeBob Squarepants ( I <3 Patrick)
2. The Fairly Oddparents
3. Jimmy Neutron
4. The Simpsons
5. Johnny Bravo
6. Dexter's Lab
7. The Simpsons
8. PPG
10. Hey Arnold

Shows i HAVE to watch on Mondays
1. Still Standing
2. Yes Dear
3. Frasier
4. Friends
5. Reruns of the Kumars at No. 42

and now you know.